Fate's Puzzle
by Jonathan Priest
Summary: One shot. Five years after the war, Katara contemplates fate's influence in the lives of herself and a certain airbender, and feels a crushing guilt in her relationship with the Avatar. Sometimes, all it takes is a little hope and a lot of love.


Disclaimer: I own nothing of Nickeloden, Avatar or anything relating to this series, it's a fanfiction, so don't sue me as I'm making no money.

Fate's Puzzle

There were times, when the night was at its most silent, when the rest of the world was immersed in peaceful slumber, that the young waterbender found herself plagued with thoughts and memories too vivid to allow her mind find comfort in her dreams. On occasions like this, she simply chose to relive her younger days, the days spent on the back of a great flying bison, learning about the world, helping those in need, fighting a war and of course, finding herself falling in love. Some memories were certainly better than others, but given the opportunity, she would not change a single moment of her life.

Even presented with the chance to save her mother's life, she knew she would deny herself that indulgence. Had her mother not…had her mother lived, her father would not go off to war, she and Sokka would not be left to defend the Water Tribe, she would not have ventured with her brother on the raft and they would never have discovered the iceberg that had been the Avatar's cocoon.

The memory brought a slow-forming smile to her lips as she turned her face to the man who shared her bed; his head resting comfortably against her shoulder while one arm stretched protectively over her body. It had been years since they traveled together, years since they camped out in the open fields or whatever remote location would offer them sanctuary while avoiding detection or capture. And though she always found herself amazed with the boy she adored who grew to be the man that she loved, she was never so enamored with him as she was when he slept.

It seemed all the tension and strain of the world; the anticipation of others who wanted the mighty Avatar to remedy their troubles and apprehensions had melted away when Aang would sleep. And it made her heart swell to know that only she ever saw this side of him; the man who was just a man that wanted nothing more than simplicity in his life. She wondered if that wasn't why he often slept with his arm protectively over her, as though holding desperately to the one stabilizing influence in his overly chaotic life.

She smiled tenderly at the sentiment, her fingers moving to dance lightly across the curve of his jaw as his sleeping body responded to both her affection and her closeness. There was something in her mind however, that had suddenly unsettled her, a thought that plagued her as relentlessly as her own sleepless musings and left her deeply troubled by the implication. It was a vague thought really, one that would simply drift into the ether of forgotten dreams had she not concentrated so much effort to take possession of it, to hold it and examine it thoroughly, as if to understand all of it, it's allusions and the truth that was just beyond her grasp.

As cautiously as possible, she moved Aang's arm from her and eased herself out of bed. Leaving their bedchamber, she walked the length of their modest home in Ba Sing Se, finding her destination at the terrace that faced the mountains just beyond the inner wall. She walked towards the edge of the patio and rested her hands against the banister, a sigh escaping her lips as she tried and failed to calm her troubled mind.

Her eyes sought comfort, finding substance, not in the stable and unmoving mountains, but the stars that peppered the evening canvas with their seemingly whimsy playfulness. It seemed to remind her of such a simpler time, the thought that even those that looked down upon them when the sun set, still found joy in entertaining those who knew to gaze upon the nightly dance of the spirits that had passed from the world. She searched the sky briefly, wondering which star was her mother before reminding herself of her unsettling thoughts. Abandoning her short search for the maternal star, she concentrated instead on which among the countless souls that glittered tonight…were the Airbenders? And she wondered vainly, as she searched unsuccessfully for the departed culture, if they would have approved of her? As ridiculous as it seemed, she could not help but wonder if she was not somehow responsible for what had happened to them, and it was that, single question that so took possession of her mind, that prevented her from reclaiming her composure.

Sighing dejectedly as she bowed her head, her knuckles white with the pressure of gripping the banister, she looked up once more before speaking softly, "How long have you been standing there?" She did not even need to know he had followed her, she had felt his presence behind her, and it was only her preoccupied thoughts that distracted her from him.

"A few minutes after you left the bed," Aang said softly as he moved to join her, feeling that now she acknowledged his presence, he was given permission to join her.

"I'm sorry I woke you," she said equally soft. "I couldn't sleep and well…never mind. Go back to sleep, I'll join you soon."

"That's alright," Aang responded in kind, his fingers reaching out to take Katara's hand in his own, "I think I'd rather just stay out here for a little bit." Katara smiled shyly at the gesture, her heart swelling just by Aang's the mere presence. This was what she loved most about him, what she cherished above all his gifts to their relationship, his infinite patience. He would remain comfortably silent, never pressing the issue, never asking what was on her mind, but simply being near her, supportive and consoling, until she was ready to talk. That simple, beautiful trait was her reminder to never take him for granted. She could only hope she gave him as much in return.

But as she thought on their relationship and love for each other, her mind was again assaulted by the unfounded guilt that seemed to compress upon her. After several moments, she finally broke the comfortable silence. "Can I ask you something?"

Turning his head slightly to indicate he was listening, Katara continued, "Do you believe in fate?"

"I don't think I would have gotten very far without it," Aang said, a slight smile tugging at his lips as he titled his head to look more fully at Katara. "The short answer I suppose is, yes, I do believe in fate. It's kind of a prerequisite for being a monk. But I'd also like to think choice plays a part in there somewhere."

"I see," Katara responded, her mouth bending into a frown that did not at all suit her alluring features. Certainly it was not an expression Aang ever wanted to see on his lovely waterbender. Everything he did was an effort to make her life as fulfilling and joyous as possible, and to see her deeply troubled expression meant he had not done enough.

"Is that what has been bothering you? The idea that we have no control over our lives?" Aang asked, hoping to address the real concern behind her troubles.

"Not entirely. But," Katara said, pausing as she looked again at the sky and studying the stars that seemed to oddly stop twinkling, as though they too were listening to her confession. "Some things are just beyond our control to change, which means either the universe is incredibly random, or incredibly cruel."

"I don't think the universe is anything really," Aang replied, shrugging his shoulders as though the thought hadn't been thoroughly examined. "It's not random, it's not loving, it's not cruel, it just…is. Our lives are guided by fate, but written by us."

"And that's the whole problem, isn't it?" Katara said again, her frown now moving to her eyes as her brow crinkled in thought.

"Not if you don't let it be."

"No Aang, it's just not that easy," Katara sighed again as she turned her head away from the stars, but rather than turned to face him, she turned away from him as well.

Turning his back on the world beyond their simple home so that he leaned, back against the banister, Aang took Katara by the shoulders and pulled her until she stood in front of him, his fingers cupping her chin and forcing her eyes to lock his own. No matter how long he lived, he would never get tired of being drawn into her eyes.

"Then explain it to me," Aang replied, his hand moving from her chin to her cheek and fully capturing her face in the simple action.

"You, you'll just think I'm being silly."

"Katara, there is nothing you can say to me that I will ever think you're being silly or ridiculous, and if it troubles you this much, I want to hear it. There's nothing more that I want than to make you happy. I can't…always promise to do that, but I can at least try."

"Alright, fine, but just don't laugh, okay?" She asked, and for a moment, her eyes shined in the same, hopeful innocence she possessed when she was a younger woman. "It's my fault."

Arching an eyebrow as though expecting more, Aang tilted his head to better look at Katara's downcast eyes. "That's rather ambiguous. Care to elaborate?"

"The Airbenders," Katara said quietly, closing her eyes in silent shame. "What happened to the Airbenders was my fault."

For a few moments, silence stretched between the two of them as Katara still held her eyes closed, not wanting to see the expression on Aang's face. Finally, the Avatar spoke, and it did nothing to calm the young woman's mind. "Okay, remember when I said nothing you say will make me think you're being ridiculous? I take it back."

"I'm being serious Aang," Katara replied, her eyes opening to reveal the hint of anger that was much more prevalent in her younger days.

"I know, and that makes it all the more amusing," He said, laughing slightly at the expression on her face. "I mean, all these years you've been telling me that my desertion of the temple did not lead to the Airbenders deaths, and now you tell me it's because of you. I mean, they died out…well, before Gran-Gran was even born, you can't deny the irony."

"I knew I shouldn't have said anything," Katara replied, turning to leave, but Aang's strong hands on her shoulders prevented her departure.

"No, no, don't go. Look, I'm sorry, okay. I didn't mean to make light of this it's just, well, I don't know where you got this idea. I don't see how any of it could be your fault."

At this, Katara fell silent as she bowed her head. Taking several steadying breaths, she raised her head to look at Aang once more. "Since I couldn't sleep tonight, I let my mind wander a bit on, my life I guess, all the things that led up to us meeting mostly. I mean, as hard as it is to think about, my mother's death was almost a necessary component to us meeting. Without that, my father would not have gone to war, my brother and I would not have been left to defend the tribe, and we wouldn't have gone fishing that day. I mean, what if the current took us some place else, what if it took you somewhere different than where we were. What if I decided not to go on the fishing trip or if Sokka had chosen to right instead of left. There were simply too many unknown variables that made it a mere coincidence."

"You're talking about fate again then, aren't you?" It wasn't a question that needed to be answered, but Katara nodded regardless.

"Yes," she stated simply, "I've been giving it a lot of thought. Everything that happened had to happen the way it did in order for us to meet. If my mother hadn't died, my father hadn't left the tribe, then he would have been the one to find the iceberg you were in, or he wouldn't have, given that I had water bended out of my frustration, which caused your ice cocoon to surface."

"I know a lot of bad things happened to you Katara," Aang said, his words careful so not to further upset her as he took her in his arms and held her against him, his lips finding comfort in her hair before loosening his hold. "I know you've suffered, and I hope that, maybe I've taken away some of your grief?"

Katara shook her head, not in denial of his comfort and fulfillment in her life, but because he had not grasped the whole picture. "You don't understand Aang," she said, her hand coming to rest against his cheek and caressing his face with as much comfort as she could give. "As I've been thinking about all of this, all the things that happened to me in order for us to meet the way we did, I realized just how many things had to happen to you for the same circumstance to be occur."

Thinking quietly as Aang recalled his life before his reawakening; he shook his head and smiled, "That had nothing to do with you, or with me. I learned I was the Avatar, and I left, not because of what I was forced to do, what I was forced to become, but because the monks would have taken me away from Gyatso. The Fire Nation attacked after I was frozen. It was no one's fault that it happened."

"But Aang," Katara said quietly as she pulled back to look him in the eye, her arms still draped over his shoulders, his arms around her waist, "What if we had returned to the Southern Air Temple, and you found it flourishing with Airbenders, Air Bison, Lemur, would have still traveled with Sokka and me? Or would you have remained with your own people?"

"I'd travel with you and Sokka, just the way it was meant to be."

"You say that now," Katara answered, pulling him close so that she could share her intimacy with him and her fear of what could have been had life been different. "You say that after our travels are long since over, but can you be so certain that you wouldn't have abandoned us, two virtual strangers you'd only just met, so you could remain with your own people?"

"Honestly, I'd like to think so…but I get what you're saying," Aang responded, knowing how twisted the entire concept was, only to realize Katara was right. Everything in life, the good and the bad that happened to them had brought them to this moment, just as this moment would bring them to the next. But there was something Katara was missing, something vital that Aang himself, had not quite figured out yet.

"The only way to guarantee our lives would have worked out the way they did was, well…"

"For the Airbenders to have died," Aang finished, nodding his head in understanding as he held Katara tightly, bringing her close to his own body. As he closed his eyes in silent thought, it finally came to him, the final piece of the mystery he had considered but wasn't quite able to understand. It was that single piece that would not only ease Katara's mind, but answer her questions about fate and their place in it as well.

"So, if I'm understanding you right," Aang began, pulling away again to gaze into Katara's eyes. "Then your saying for us to be together, to like we are right now, I would have had to have been told I was the Avatar earlier than intended, learn the monks wished to separate me from Gyatso, frozen myself in a big ball of ice, and for the Airbenders to have all died off. And for some reason, you feel that our life together, our love we have is to blame?"

Turning her eyes downcast so to avoid the guilt she felt from even suggesting such a thing, Katara meekly nodded her head. "When you say it out loud, it does sound kind of stupid, but yeah…I can't help it. If things in this world happen for a reason, then every bad thing that's happened to us, the Airbenders, my mother, everything we've endured, it happened to ensure we'd be together."

"Honestly, I'm kind of flattered to think some higher being thought our love was so monumental that it took this much planning and foresight."

"This isn't something to laugh about Aang, this is serious…" Katara's words were cut off however as the Avatar's lips crashed against hers, silencing all protests, concerns and apprehensions. She was lost, absolutely absorbed into the sensation of his lips against hers, his hands pressing against her back to pull her closer to him, and she responded in kind. When he at last pulled away from her, she felt pleasantly overcome with the emotional expression pouring from the man in her arms, his love, his concern and his desire for her, and she was intoxicated by that need.

"Let me ask you something Katara, all joking aside. I'm being as serious as you want me to be about this," Aang said, his eyes fixing themselves on the woman he held. "You said that for our love to come to be, all these bad things had to happen to make sure we not only met, but that we would fall in love. So, you're mother's death…does that make it my fault?"

Katara's eyes opened wide in surprise at the accusation. She had not expected Aang to turn her own concerns about the fate of his people by turning the blame of her mother's death on himself. For a moment, it gave a new perspective to her concerns, and a realization as to how unfounded her distress was. In a way, it was even unnecessary.

"A, alright, you've made your point oh wise and powerful Avatar," Katara said, a slight, self-conscious smile toying at her lips, "no more worrying about what was, what could have been or what might have happened. Things are as they are, and I guess I just needed the right perspective to realize that." She said, wrapping her arms around him and returning his earlier kiss, feeling him relax into the contact as readily as she had done.

"Well, I don't think you were totally wrong about that though Katara."

"What do you mean," the Waterbender asked, her eyes narrowing as she studied him carefully.

"Well, given what happened to the Airbenders, your mother, the war we fought, the fear we felt when things got difficult, I think you and me finding each other was a way for the universe to reward for enduring so much," Aang said as he pulled Katara close to him once more, his crooked, playful smile painting his face. "Besides my dear, dear Katara. If you really think about, you and I are going to be mother and father to an entire nation." At the sound of her laughter, he tightened his embrace, relaxing as he felt her respond similarly. "What more could we ask for?"

"Just one thing," Katara said, pulling slightly away so she could look fully at Aang and his lopsided grin. Her eyes narrowed suggestively as she leaned closer to the monk, her lips grazing his as she spoke. "And we've already been given that."

-The End

OC: Whew, my first Avatar fanfic. I recently bought the entire series, never watched it on Nickeloden, but have to say, this series was incredible, and not only that, I find myself an Kataang shipper, which is more impressive as I don't ship for series.

Anyway, this story takes place probably 5-7 years after the end of the series. Hope you enjoy. If you're kind enough to read, please be kind enough to review. Thank you.


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